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Dating in Vancouver? A Change Can Do You Good
"It's hard to find a partner in Vancouver."
I hear that line from Vancouver singles almost daily. Different spins include how cliquish the BC city can be and how hard it is to mix and mingle with interesting people in downtown.
The truth of it is -- you are in a rut.
The definition of rut is "a habit or pattern of behavior that has become dull and unproductive but is hard to change." A dating rut is like watching NASCAR, it feels like you are making continuous left turns with the same people, in the same area and getting no where.
ating in Vancouver, and other major cities around the world, can be frustrating. It's exhausting. You're spending more money on dates that go nowhere than you are on rent. I get it.
Like any good sporting or life coach will tell you, if something isn't working -- change it. The easiest areas of dating to alter is your attitude, the venue and your "type".
Change Your Attitude Your dating life starts in your head. You control your thoughts, thoughts control your feelings and attitude. If you focus on the negative aspects of dating or your date for the evening, you will only ever see the negative. Try taking one positive aspect away from each date.
It would also help to go into each encounter with a sense of adventure or excitement rather than dread and fear. Instead of thinking it's "hard to find a partner in Vancouver," think "There are tons of people in Vancouver just waiting to meet me."
Change of Venue Feel like you are doing the same thing over and over again? Whether it is the same pub, restaurant or neighborhood, shaking up your dating venue or activity can put a spark into dating. Instead of meeting up for dinner in Yaletown for each and every date, think about coffee or lunch in Kits.
Personally, I think weekend brunch is ideal. You have time to connect, can make it short or extend it and you still have the rest of your day.
Change Your "Type"Some people only date those over 5'7". Others are looking for a man with a degree. There are some who prefer brunette women (sorry, Marilyn). Everyone has preferences when it comes to their ideal mate. However, these preferences can be a bit limiting if they don't allow ourselves to explore new people or new ideas.
Look beyond your normal (but within legal) age range. Date someone a bit shorter or outside of your profession. Give into impulse and accept that lunch offer from the delivery guy. Step out of your norm.
Dating is a numbers game. The more potential mates you meet, the more likely it is that you will find the one.
If something isn't working, change it. It's the only way something new will happen.
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